Day -30: The Big Pad

I would consider the sleeping pad optional in terms of “must have” equipment for a bike trip.  If I were instead hiking the AT, where I had to carry every pound of weight that I wanted to bring with me, I would most likely not include a mattress.  I am not saying that I wouldn’t in the end regret not bringing a pad, but just that heading into the trip the idea seems too luxuriant to me.  Real men sleep on the cold hard earth, because this is how we replenish our machismo.  Aside from buying a larger truck that has more “payload” than your current large truck, there is no better means to make one’s testicles appear bigger to the larger community then by sleeping in a tent without a pad.  Man rock big!

Cascade Designs seems to be the most popular name in travel mattresses, through their “Thermarest” series.  You can pick all variations of the Thermarest mattress, which vary the spectrum between weight, comfort, width/length, and expense.  Most mattresses, except for the lightest in weight, are self-inflating.  There are 3 broad categories of mattresses – “Fast & Light”, “Trek & Travel” and “Camp & Comfort”.

If you are confused as to which category best fits your needs, then at a basic level, if you are planning on carrying the mattress any great distance, you can cross the “Camp & Comfort” category off the list.  Camp & Comfort pads carry descriptions such as “luxurious” and “deluxe”.  These are clearly mattresses intended for the weekend camper who drives up to the campground, parks, and sets up a tent 2 feet away from the vehicle.  There’s a time and place for that, so I am not knocking it for sure.  Another obvious feature is comfort for this line, so men can also straight out ignore this category, given that the thickness of the mattress will interrupt their groundswell machismo source and leave their libido soft and deflated – and fellas, there ain’t no amount of cologne that will attract the ladies to you after that.  Game over.

So this leaves the other 2 categories.  I’m going to go ahead now and kill the suspense and let you know that I purchased the “Trail” mattress from the “Trek & Travel” line.  I did this for 2 reasons: because I wanted a mattress with some substance to it (for comfort purposes) and because it was the cheapest of the lot.  There is a lighter version (Trail Lite) and a more, um, sophisticated version (Trail Pro), but these come with a price.  Actually, funny thing is that while I am writing this post I am researching the prices of the different Thermarest mattresses, and I am seeing that I was thoroughly ripped off by the vendor that sold me this stupid useless pad.  They charged me $55.  This is a whole $15 more than the highest price that I found online.  Now I’m just pissed off.  Unbelievable.  They charged me 16 bucks for that cheap cooking set I bought.  How much is it really – $8?  My God, and I trusted those fatback republicans with my heart.

The final category is the “Fast & Light”.  Here’s where you want to go if you are seriously backpacking for a long distance and weight matters.  I’d definitely check out the “Z-Light”, as this appears to be the flagship model and has gotten some good reviews.  You’ll pay more for the technology, but, um…. well, I don’t know.  Are you as bored as I am right now?

I’m kind of done with writing about pads.