In the first of our special series interviewing key global figures that are making a difference in these strange and apocalyptic times – a segment that we are calling “Xtreme Hotspot” – Biased Bohemian sits down with Trish Johnson, owner and CEO of Lightning Urgency Zero Effort Résumés (LUZER), a Portland Oregon start-up that has reaped windfalls consulting the city’s unemployed despite the hard economic times. Amid news last week of 131,000 jobs lost in the month of July and an unemployment rate stagnating at 9.5%, Biased Bohemian’s Unpaid Journalist #1 met with Trish on a Friday afternoon at the nearby Harbucks cafe. She had an Americano with an extra espresso shot. Unpaid Journalist #1 had toast and a Vitamin Water. Here’s what Trish had to say when we put her on the Hotspot:
Biased Bohemian: Ms. Johnson, you have had quite the success with your company Lightning Urgency Zero Effort Résumés. Last year alone you reported profits upwards of 25%. This despite being in business only 4 years. Tell us, what would you consider your Xtreme Hotspot?
Trish Johnson: I’m sorry, I don’t understand the question.
BB: What is your secret to success?
TJ: You know, you would be surprised at how many people have asked me that
BB: Indeed.
TJ: [pauses]
BB: Go on.
TJ: As I was saying, quite frequently people are surprised at how successful LUZER (pronounced by Johnson like “leh-shore”) has been despite offering such a focused product set. But quite frankly I think that it is due to the very fact that LUZER offers such a focused product set that we have been so successful. As a business-owner, you need to identify what differentiates your company from the rest. Find a niche that will speak to your potential customers and go with it. To me the answer was staring me in the face. What do people want most in life before anything else? A job! And thats where LUZER comes into play.
BB: I do find it a coincidence that we are meeting on a day when the economy has taken a turn for the worse. 131,000 jobs lost in July alone.
TJ: Yes, several people have said that to me today, but if you actually read through the papers and look back over the past few years the results from today shouldn’t be a surprise. The US economy has not been healthy for a while now and people have for months found it difficult to find a job. The problem is that nobody wants to talk about it. The media and the government would rather pretend that we are in this amazing period of sustained growth. I think the reports that you heard today are a sign of things to come as people wake up to reality. The unfettered growth of 2009 and early 2010 is coming to a screeching halt, and many people are losing their jobs and being caught with their pants down and no résumé.
BB: So you mention that LUZER has something to offer the unemployed person as a means to get them a job.
TJ: Believe it or not, you just answered your own question.
BB: Indeed.
TJ: It’s in the LUZER name – Lightning Urgency Zero Effort Résumés. We offer people hassle-free and no-holds-barred assistance in drafting résumés. That’s our value proposition.
BB: Helping unemployed people draft résumés in order to get them a job. I fail to see the connection.
TJ: And that’s the problem. Most people are like you and have never even considered the résumé. You’ve hit on the LUZER secret [or hotspot as you called it earlier]. We offer a free consultation to all people that come into our establishment, and the message is quite simple. It boils down to 5 things that every unemployed person must know. Follow these 5 things and I guarantee you that you will get a job in one month’s time. Would you like to know what they are?
BB: Lay it on me.
TJ: First, and most important, you need a résumé. This comes as a surprise to most people but the fact of the matter is that we live in the 21st century, and most employers want and expect a résumé. The days of handshakes and back room deals are over. Second, you must include contact information on the résumé. Sure, people are suspicious and value their privacy, but without contact information the employer has no way of knowing whose résumé they are looking at. I could help you compile the best résumé in the world, but if you don’t give your name and a means for somebody to contact you then the company will never be able to give you that one thing that you want.
BB: And what’s that?
TJ: The job offer. I tell all my clients that they should in the least include a name. Not the name of the LUZER employee that drafted the résumé or the name of the résumé template. This should be the client’s own first name and last name. This will show the employer that you are interested in continuing with the hiring process. From there consider including your address and telephone. An email address, if you can get one, will also help. This dovetails nicely with the third thing that you must do – include your work history. This is a common item that most people forget because everybody wants to keep their résumé to one page. With the contact information and head shot already included, people often have no remaining space for their work history. I tell my clients that the one page résumé requirement is an old way of doing things. People commonly have résumés that span 2-3 pages. I say make the résumé as large as possible and show the company just how much experience you really have. You worked hard to get where you are, why sell yourself short by condensing it to one page?
BB: I must admit, I also thought that a single page résumé is preferred.
TJ: You are not alone. This is a common misconception that I continually struggle with helping my clients overcome. But the proof is in the pudding. Those clients that have been partnering with LUZER for the longest amount of time also tend to have the longest résumés. I have one man whose résumé spans over 10 pages. This is a relationship that has generated a good amount of profit for my company. We call these long term clients “LUZERs” as they are like one of the family and are very much versed in our teaching. Hell, I’d hire some of them as consultants if the economy wasn’t so fucking bad. Point being, your résumé should always include contact information at the top, then your head shot, then the work history – in that order.
Okay, fourth item is pretty straight forward but one that people occasionally are unaware of. The résumé should be drafted using some form of word processing software and saved as an electronic document. Hand written résumés are difficult to edit and one needs to rewrite the entire thing in order to make a copy. A similar problem exists for résumés compiled on a typewriter. Most employers also expect you to submit a résumé electronically, which is difficult if the résumé is hand written.
That brings us to the final item and the most common one that people forget. It is not enough to just have a résumé, you must also submit that résumé to a company – preferably one that is hiring or accepting résumés and for which you would like to work. Most companies don’t know that you are out there and looking for a job, no matter how qualified you are for the position that they are offering. By submitting your resume, or, as some people call it, applying for a job, you let the company know that you exist and that you are interested in working for them. Here, I have brought along a diagram for you to include in your article that clarifies the submission process.
BB: Well, that certainly is a lot to take in and consider. I suspect that our readers will find this information quite useful. Any additional tips for prospective LUZER’s before we part?
TJ: Just remain optimistic. Remember, you are not the only one out there without a job. As a result, other people may apply to the same position that you apply for. That’s why at LUZER we tell our clients that, if you don’t hear back from the company within the first 48 hours, consider that the job has been offered to somebody else and break off all ties with the employer. We encourage that at this point the client no longer return phone calls from the company as it is common practice for HR after 48 hours to forward résumés to the marketing department who then use the contact information and references on the résumé for solicitation purposes. At all costs do not contact the company directly. Many employers find this intrusive and will discard your résumé as an act of retaliation. Remember, these people at the company have other responsibilities and each phone call is a distraction from their primary job, which is making profit.
Applying for jobs is difficult and can be emotionally draining. We recommend applying for one position a week. This gives you several days a week to research and apply for a position and five days a week to meet with a LUZER representative and touch up the résumé.
BB: Trish Johnson, it has been a pleasure
TJ: Pleasure is all mine. Thank you [for allowing me to appear on the Biased Bohemian's Xtreme Hotspot].
I thought if I just friended my potential employer they could look at my facebook info page. Apparently they did not find it to be a suitable substitute for a “traditional” résumé. Come on! This is the 21st century! I was saving a tree and streamlining the whole interview process. They said they did not care for the fact that my favorite quote was from Snoop Dogg either. Well, if they don’t got love for Snoop, I wouldn’t want to work for them anyway! If I am going to find a job in this hostile environment, I guess I will need LUZER!
P Elgnahs, you need to follow your heart. If life in the Hood ain’t no thang, then whose right is it to tell you otherwise? If people won’t hire you for who you are then you don’t want their business. Based on what you have told me, I think that Trish would definitely consider you a LUZER.
Good Luck with the job search my friend.